limerence - noun - infatuation or obsession with a person and the desire to have it reciprocated
I've been in love many times in my life, and fortunately, I've experience mutuality to a degree. That being noted, I've also encountered limerence as you probably have as well. I first discovered the word in the early 1980s while reading a book on love penned by a psychologist whose name eludes me. After I got through it, I questioned my ardor for my high-school beau who had transferred his affection for me onto his college sweetheart, leaving me in the proverbial dust, still craving his attention. Was my spurned emotion love or simply limerence? I'm thinking it was the latter.
Of course, you might think that limerence is something associated more with adolescence than authentic adulthood. Sorry, it's not. Case in point, a few days ago, I received an Easter card from the former husband of my deceased best friend who remarried fairly soon after her death because he simply could not be alone. His wife, who has grown to be a friend of mine, most likely signed the inside of the card first, leaving him to print his name beneath hers. She must have left the room at this point as he turned the card over and wrote me not a traditional love note, but one confessing his undying limerence for me. Yikes! What can be done in this instance? Nothing.
True limerence, like true unrequited love, should be left untouched, untainted, simply because the street is one way and travels south indefinitely.
Enjoy your Hump Day!
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